The process of getting over an addiction shows that healing is not a one-time thing. Effectively, we use the knowledge we have gained from our early experiences in recovery to rebuild healthy behavior and closeness in our relationships. Along the way, it is easy to get sidetracked and lose sight of sound recovery principles.
When you are an addict, your thoughts might go insane. It might be a drug need or a lot of worrying about someone or something being out of control. Regardless of what you believe, your monkey brain creates a dominant inner critic.
This negative thought process distracts you from living in the moment.
An addict’s journey from sobriety to peace begins with developing the ability to parent one-self or in short “Self-Parenting”. It is necessary to go back in time in order to find the underlying cause of addiction. Addicts that go through this process learn to recognize and overcome issues in their family of origin that is the root of their present addicted behavior. Practicing self-parenting is a never-ending process of resetting and re-doing.
Some ideas to consider:
Create a tranquil state of mind apart from the daily stresses of healing through meditation:
Mindfulness requires a beginner’s mind. When your mind is empty, it is ready for anything and open to everything. A beginner’s mind is open to numerous possibilities while the expert is open to only a few. Quieting your mind depends upon the skill of meditation. When you meditate you focus on your breath as it rises and falls. When your mind wanders, you simply notice the distraction and bring yourself back to the breath. As you practice, little by little, you will begin to discriminate the raw sensory events from your reaction to them. Eventually, you will experience a gradual stillness within.
Note what disturbs or distracts you and keeps you from enjoying the moment:
“Nothing changes until it is real” -Fritz Perls
There are various ways nagging pain emerges. It can be physical or emotional; however, both go hand in hand. Physical pain might signal an imbalance. Alerts are given when anything is off and needs to be fixed. Therefore, observe what your body tells you!
You are on an emotional rollercoaster. Sometimes joyful and sometimes depressed. Feelings matter. Whenever something goes wrong, they will alert you.
Make a list of past and present experiences that have caused you emotional discomfort and rage. Even if you have previously dealt with one of the difficulties on the list, do not worry. If it is bothering you, put it on your list. This would help you to put into words what is going on within your head.
Create a safe spot:
You may have done anger work over a caregiver’s rejection. More anger management is needed over time. To achieve this, establish a safe environment. Grief work with rage is rarely finished. It is a continuous process. Create a space to revisit angry old hurts. A buddy who is a fair witness might be useful. Focus your anger on the person who did you wrong. Share unedited angry expressions. Allow the rage to flow and be with your feelings. Then, aim your anger onto abandonment, neglect, and unfulfilled needs. Turn your anger into creative energy.
How may anger be used positively? Set a boundary and commit to self-parenting and self-esteem. There are various methods to express anger. Under the anger come sentiments of grief, disappointment, sorrow, etc. Recognize each sensation thoroughly.
To calm your mind, you will need to give yourself time to work through feelings of sadness from time to time throughout your life. Therefore, it is important to have a safe spot.
Imagine yourself caring for your vulnerable self with consideration and kindness:
It takes a lot of effort to feel the raw emotions of pain, resentment, rage, and disappointment. It is much more difficult to keep one’s own critical voice out of the process. As long as you practice and exercise regularly, you will get better. After you have done your emotional work, you will need to see yourself as a person who can articulate their emotions. Addicts in recovery sometimes ignore the importance of affirmation and visualization activities. It is essential to recognize and appreciate the effort you perform in your safe place. Affirmations are a potent antidote to the false ideas that are triggered by shame. Visualization is a premeditated energizing force that quiets your mind in healing.